Sometimes it is time to say goodbye. Goodbye to people, goodbye to things that used to bring us joy, goodbye to the past. It enables you to look more into the present and prepare for the future. This said, it is one of the hardest things to do. Not just saying bye to people but also to things that remind you of how things used to be. Whether they are painful or happy memories does not matter, it can be as equally difficult. It all depends on how you cope.
Am I going to be the person that is not able to cope and goes back to old habits and hides from friends and the truth?
Am I going to be the person that can just move on and understand the situation and not mind that much?
Do I have a choice...?
I think how we cope is different in every situation. Saying bye to memories is something I find extremely difficult. I can't seem to let go of the past and am scared of the future. What it holds and how it will unfold without my control scares me everyday, The rational part of me says; "you have no control over how the future will be, only over how you see the present day so why worry". But the constantly scared part of me reminds me everyday of how things were when I was younger and how everything just seemed so much easier. When I look back I feel like it was a completely different life that I had. Like it is not MY past but someone else's, I'm sure this is something at least one of you can relate to as well. It seems as though these memories come back every time I have to let go of someone. The sadness of having to leave behind a friend with whom you shared memories, secrets, jokes, can bring back not just that part of the past but everything from before as well. This is what makes it so difficult. It is not the knowing you will no longer make any more memories. It is the knowing that the ones you have no longer matter, that they should be wiped and should be seen as bad memories and not happy ones. Because the person let you down....so how can any of those memories really be happy? We want to make those memories bad...because if they were good then we really are letting go of someone we cared about and saw as a friend, and that reality hurts more than anything else.
So how do we move forward?..... we choose.
